The Mind of Riku 5!
by SaruMashi
Summary: Oh goodness...Not again...


_Omg...Hello! I'm sorry I haven't been writing in awhile...No, I take that back...I'm sorry I haven't been writing in a long time! Gomen Gomen Gomen!!! Any who...This is what I'ma gunna try to continue..._

_Mind Of Riku...So Sexy...Anyway...Yeeeaahhh...Fuck...I'm sick with a headcold too..._

Dis-fuckin-Claimer – I do not own Kingdom Hearts(1, 2) or Final Fantasy VII or any other game or anime or...anything for that matter.

Warning: Stop!... Yaoi time...Yeahs, you know you like the way boys shake there ass's on the dance floor if ya know what I mean sings

**o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"_And now...In other news! Moogle's are going on a killing rampage! Some say it was bound to happen! More on this subject later! Right now we have just been notified about a video that right after you watch it...Your Phone will ring...and, a voice will say...You Will Get A New Porno...But Not Just Any Porno...Dog Porno...Hahahhaaa... WTF? Is that really what it says...Fuck I quit!"_

Daaaammmn...Go Moogle's...And Dog porno...The news rox...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Cid Sids...

Audience- "Awww! Angry glare

What? Oops...Thats bad isn't it? spanks self

**o-o-o-o-o**

I am going to say this one more time!!! Kairi is a Bitch!! B-I-T-C-H! Bitch I say! Total Bitch!

I mean...Daaaamn! Now she's hitting on Sephiroth! Cloud is now emo...So he has joined me in my new "K.I.A.F.B.A.W.C." which stands for... "Kairi Is A Fuckin Bitch Ass Whore Club" ...Right Cloud!?

Cloud- Sham Yo! nods

Good Boy...

Cloud- I'm going to go and cut my wrists now...Bye Bye! skips off to hell knows where

Damn emo's...

**o-o-o-o-o**

As that subject just ended...I thought to myself...

Sora- Thought What Riku?

That emo's are everywhere...

Sora- Why do you say that Riku?

Because...I mean...Foo Shizel... Emo's need to learn when to grow up! Stop listening to your music with hardcore names...Like : "_Bitch Slap Myself Because I Need" _or _"Cut My Wrists And Hope To Die" _

Sora- Ohh...Why do they have such hardcore names Riku?

I don't know...But...Teh Bitches Don't know when to stop cryin' in there dark corners crying because the slut they were going out with was caught cheating and now you are slitting ya fukin wrists and bitch moaning in the corners of a local supermarket and you may also be sucking on a tampon...Cuz you though your ex-girlfriend was hot on her period...Thats jus sick man...I mean Wakka dos that type O shit! And he's not even emo!

Sora- I see...Why isn't he emo Riku?

Why you asking so many questions Sora???

Sora- I see! Why Riku?

Shut up...

Sora- Oh, ok...Tell me more Riku?

No...

Sora- Why?

Cuz...

Sora- Why?

Sora- Why are you so quiet Riku?

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

Sora- ...Why?

AHHHHHHH!!! cries in a dark corner

Sora- Hahahaaa...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo what it is motherfuckers!?

Whats up you say? Me bitches! Ha!

**o-o-o-o-o**

Woot...What kinda word is that?

A Pimp't one...

**o-o-o-o-o**

I'm not on crack...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Holy Shit! I just saw a video...With a girl...that had like...MAJOR MANGO BAZZOOCA BOOBS!!!

Man they were fukin HUGE! HUGE!! Like... boob job x 10... Crazy...It's crazy...and creepy

I'd actually do Kairi if she had boobs like that...hmm...But still...it's creepy...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Wanna know somethin' else thats creepy...Kairi's toe fungus...It's like...in between her big toe and pinky toe...And she has abnormal feet anyway...So anyway...It's like...green and...Oh, sometimes it's purple and red! It's like an ogre...She already looks like one though, OHHHHH!! Take dat beo-ch! And next time you make a move on MY Sora, better make sure you kiss his lips, you were like totally kissin air! Cuz he was makin out with me, hoe!

**o-o-o-o-o**

Speaking of making out...Me and Sora WERE making out... Here's the low down...

Me and Sora was watching The Exorcist...I don't know why...But we were...And he got all like scared and held onto me...And I was lyke...Scuweet, and like...He got totally on-top of me and I was like...TIGHT! Also...tight in the pants...He was like "ohh, Riku, I'm scared" in this sexy uke voice. That.Was.It...I had him on his back in seconds...Oh yeah... Ridin' Dirty...Mmm-Hmm...

He was so hott, Yeah Yeah... We like hat such hardcore sex...Yeah...Mmm-Hmm...He couldn't sit down for 2 weeks! His ass was red for days! Hahahahaa...hahaha...haha...ha...haaa...ha...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Ha...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Oh my fucking god I've had such a bad weekend...I had to stay at the hospital the whole time!

Why you ask? Because that fucking dick Tidus has to be a cunt and fall down the stairs with scissors!

My goodness...

Fortunately the bastard lost his right left eye...haha...

But man...Tidus was all wimpy and stupid...

He was all like, "Riku! I'm in so much pain, and since your so drop dead sexy I thought maybe you could take me?"

Tidus- I so did not say that you bastard!

Hey! Watch your fucking language! And Yes you did!

Tidus- Nuh-uh!

Okay thats it! I'm going to rape you!

Tidus- Sweet!

...man...Tidus is one fucked up mothah fuckah...

**o-o-o-o-o**

Ooookay...

I've heard some people say to me before that I cuss too much...

I don't cuss to much you cunts!

...Hey...I'm gunna see how many languages I can say "fuck" in...

Fok...

Fage...

Foc...

Ficken...

Fakku...

Futuere...

Fokk...

Fack...

I wonder if I said those right...?

But wait! Thats off the fucking topic!

I don't cuss alot!

I swear!

No, I mean...I don't swear...I mean that I swear that I don't cuss!

Ah Forget...you idiotic mofo's wouldn't understand my intelligent language any fuckin' way!

sniff

**o-o-o-o-o**

Ooookay! Yes! Done with the 5th Mind Of Riku!

Again...I am sorry about not writing for so long...


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